Extra, Extra …   

as in extra or superfluous words!

Today, it’s time to learn how to get rid of those extra or superfluous words.

Polonius, a character in William Shakespeare’s   "Hamlet," utters the famous line, “Brevity is the soul of wit” – and then hilariously rambles on and on using anything BUT brevity!

The length of today’s lesson might make you think of Polonius, but it’s essential to point out some extremely common examples of superfluous words in our everyday writing and speech. This is an enormous problem in writing, and I don’t want to leave out these key offenders.

So, let us consider this a prime teaching moment. Stay with me to the end, please!

First, superfluous means, the Merriam Webster online 

dictionary says:

exceeding what is sufficient or necessary: extra: not needed: unnecessary; obsolete: marked by wastefulness; extravagant.

Get the idea? We’re talking about adding words that add nothing to a sentence or story and simply take up space. This is especially vital in the print world, where you may be surprised to learn that virtually 100% of stories newspapers take from wire services such as The Associated Press are shortened/trimmed to fit a certain space or “news hole.” An AP story on a fire might be 17 paragraphs long, but your local newspaper might have room for only eight or nine paragraphs. Longer stories are chopped even more drastically, meaning you never see up to 75% of what the writer included in the story.

Even stories written by the newspaper’s own reporters often need to be trimmed, at times substantially. All of which means every word matters and space is precious. So don’t waste it on superfluous words or phrases (depending on how they are used) like these:

currently, presently, yet, still, different, in order to, thus far, on

Closely related are redundancies such as these:

totally destroyed, very or totally unique, ATM machine, GPS systems, safe haven, new record, PIN number, angry mob, terrible tragedy, advance warning, absolutely essential, final outcome, end result, once again

You'll need to see these in sentences to know what I mean, so bear with me. But first:

TODAY'S TOP TIP: Reading the sentences of your story out loud is a great way to discover these and ANY mistakes and is always a good idea unless really crunched for time.

On to the examples:

• Currently and presently usually are just wasted words in constructions like The mayor currently earns $50,00 a year and The position presently is vacant. The mayor earns says the same thing, in fewer words!
• Same with yet. Tell me the difference, other than a wasted word, between No suspects have been arrested and No suspects have been arrested yet. None! So why use it? Or still, as in Police are still investigating the crime.
• Different also is worthless in such uses as He visited three different cities. As opposed to three THE SAME cities? Of course they're different, so there's no need to point out this painfully obvious fact.
• Thus far also adds zero. Thus far, three birds have died is identical (other than the wasted words) to Three birds have died.
• In order to is particularly pointless. I walk in order to stay healthy is no different than I walk to stay healthy. So WHY USE IT?
• On is usually a worthless bridge not needed and just a wasted word. Such as He died on Monday. Just say He died Monday!  

PARROT'S DISEASE   REMINDER: Be skeptical and look things up to be sure! Do not trust myths and rumors or repeat things you have seen or heard, no matter how common. This is how such atrocious writing as the examples cited becomes so common. Be uncommon and be sure something you write is correct. Don't just parrot what you read and hear!

Here's a great example of not checking the facts and just going with something because it is commonly used: "Say good night, Gracie!" "Good night, Gracie!"

Many reporters have cited that alleged exchange between comic couple   George Burns and Gracie Allen at the end of their shows as an indisputable fact. The truth is (trust me; I've seen at least 100 episodes of their show and it never ends that way) it's all a myth. Gracie never said the idiotic (even for HER scatterbrained character) "Good night, Gracie!" but always simply said, "Good night!" Burns said years later, as the myth took hold, that it would have been a great line but that in reality, amazingly, no one ever thought of it!

So why the common belief that she DID?
Parrot's Disease!


Examples from the redundancy department:

• Totally/completely destroyed. Wasted words! Something is either destroyed (as in no longer exists) or IT ISN'T! There's no way to be in the middle. So modifying destroyed here is meaningless.

• Same with angry mob. ALL mobs are angry or they wouldn't be a mob. There are no "happy" mobs. Just say mob.
• Very unique may sound descriptive, but being unique already means not like anything else, so there's no way to correctly modify unique. Either you are unique or you aren't. How can you be "very unlike anything else"? It's just unique.
• ATM machine,    GPS system and PIN number are all redundant because the last letter of each acronym already stands for the next word used. So you are saying automated teller machine machine and personal identification number number. Just say ATM and GPS device and spell it out as personal identification number (and just PIN in later references) to avoid the bad writing.

• Safe haven is ridiculously redundant. By definition, ALL havens are safe. So the word safe adds nothing at all. Same with terrible tragedy, a remarkably common phrase. Ever once witnessed or heard of a wonderful tragedy? They're all terrible or they wouldn't be tragedies!
• Final outcome, end result, absolutely essential and advance warning also are one word too many. They do nothing to improve on outcome, result, essential and warning. So leave out the worthless final, end, essential and advance here!
• Once again is a curious choice of words. As opposed to twice again? Just saying again says it all.
• It sounds logical to say, "He's just set a new record," and sports announcers are forever phrasing it that way. But every time you set a record, it's new. You can't set an OLD record. So just say, "That's a record" or "He just set a record with that shot."

There are many other examples worth pointing out, but it's time to wrap it up.

My next post will be on non sequiturs (Latin for does not follow). You'll just have to follow me to find out what they are and why avoiding them is so important in good writing. Stay tuned ...